Male Sexual Victimization Myths & Facts

Adapted from a presentation at the 5th International Conference on Incest and Related Problems, Biel, Switzerland, August 14,

1991.

Feminist Apologetic Myth 'Fact' #1 - Boys and men can't be victims.

This myth, instilled through masculine gender socialization and sometimes referred to as the "macho image," declares that males, even young boys, are not supposed to be victims or even vulnerable. We learn very early that males should be able to protect themselves. In truth, boys are children - weaker and more vulnerable than their perpetrators - who cannot really fight back. Why? The perpetrator has greater size, strength, and knowledge. This power is exercised from a position of authority, using resources such as money or other bribes, or outright threats - whatever advantage can be taken to use a child for sexual purposes.

Feminist Apologetic Myth 'Fact' #2 - Most sexual abuse of boys is perpetrated by homosexual males.

Pedophiles who molest boys are not expressing a homosexual orientation any more than pedophiles who molest girls are practicing heterosexual behaviors. While many child molesters have gender and/or age preferences, of those who seek out boys, the vast majority are not homosexual. They are pedophiles. It is just that most male pedophiles assault little boys in third world countries.  If we went looking for female pedophiles however we would find more of them. Probably in exactly the same numbers, or very nearly as for men. The name 'pedophile'- and shifting it off the same sex emphasis, which is the case with most cases, neatly removes the obvious that MOST is homosexual abuse of underage kiddies. Lesbians too would be found in greater numbers also- if we went looking for them.

Tragically however the largest group having access to children is other children. Say a sixteen year old girl molesting a six year old and an eleven year old which one young women (mental health) told me with an evil cackle; so much for Mary Daly's Croning 'cackle' of goddess theology. She further averred her father abused her; and he worked for CYPHs, New Zealands Youth and young persons earlly intervention service. So he had the 'get out of jail card' all sown up. This is precisely where these people love to end up; within institutional structures that openly hide them best where no accusations are expected once initial vetting has occurred. They should be vigorously vetted in absolute depth at least once every five years and oftener for any suspicious reports of any kind at all- especially from children, mental health patients, kith and kin. Once the best place to hide was the Catholic priesthood: nowadays it in the Court system or in Government enforcement or health agencies. New Zealand once had a 'pedophile ring' found amoungst court house judges; this was suppressed. Most current 'visible' adult molestation is indeed homo=same-sexual in fact. The invisible molestation is vast levels of child-on-child molestation that no one touches- this is the real can of worms- as it needs the complete de-sexualizing of society for its cure.

This would be better for all of us as we have all been affected by its unwilling, hidden and unconscious corruption. Far far better for our children in every way. Best option for our entire culture also. Sex is not everything; its overemphasis is an addiction we can do without.

Feminist Apologetic Myth #3 - If a boy experiences sexual arousal or orgasm from abuse, this means he was a willing participant or enjoyed it.

In reality, males can respond physically to stimulation (get an erection) even in traumatic or painful sexual situations. (Get an erection- what a laugh, this is possible from vibrating machines, workshops, motor bikes, etc- look up the KULA tapioca ceremony to see how WOMEN RAPE men in a famous anthropological tribe) Therapists who work with sexual offenders know that one way a perpetrator can maintain secrecy is to label the child's sexual response as an indication of his willingness to participate. "You liked it, you wanted it," they'll say. Note how 'he/his' is used- this is notably NOT assumed in the adult cases above- that men could be victims of women too.  This what women assume of men, and men mostly go along with that; question is, should the law go along with that assesement in the name of just and fair law. Many survivors feel guilt and shame because they experienced physical arousal while being abused. Physical (and visual or auditory) stimulation is likely to happen in a sexual situation. It does not mean that the child wanted the experience or understood what it meant at the time. But see above in regard to adult women, on repression and the ideology of denial. Feminism is sexist in this regard; as sexism is itself generally; it is almost always assumed this is what MEN DO TO WOMEN and that assumption is sexist. Female chauvanist sows are never heard of as such though you hear its objective actual utterances everyday. And you wonder why a nice guy like me finally sounds so angry and cynical; yet no 'anger management today' suffices for we all know do we not that feminazis have gone way too far already and justice and common decency records the colossal unfairness: I've read Faluddis book 'Backlash' and it has predicted nothing at all of the blatant and patent distortions revealed in contemporary feminism and its outrageously unjust claims on public attentions while perpetrating one of the most heinious crimes against humanity in the entire history of our human species- and that is saying something- that of a Statistical Genocide far greater than the Holocaust by eclipsing it in the billions of lives lost rather than the merely millions in WWII. Therefore lesser crimes of great import abound in its dreadful shadow. Feminism is an evil ideology set on denying men all fair, proper and balanced rights in equality. Feminism is nothing less than female supremecy and entrenched white female privelage. There is nothing in it for men being fully expressed as men; only toy-boys, dupes, pawns, and feminazi like themselves. The fascist gaulatiers would be pleased.

Feminist Apologetic  Myth 'Fact' #4 - Boys are less traumatized by the abuse experience than girls.

While some studies have found males to be less negatively affected, more studies show that long term effects are quite damaging for either sex. Males may be more damaged by society's refusal or reluctance to accept their victimization, and by their resultant belief that they must "tough it out" in silence. In New Zealand we grant a woman crying rape an immediate cash payment of ten thousand dollars -with extensive and generous benefits rapidly to follow no questions asked; men crying same we kick in the teeth and deny him as much as we can. We pay women to accuse men. We punish men who accuse women. How's that for all's fair in love and war; no wonder men chose war.

Feminism is womens war on men. Take no prisoners. All tell lies. Truth is whatever the woman says it is. Warped statistics is the intelligence info you need to conquer an academic position. Victory in the highest ensures your tenure. Torture the men to reveal their secrets.

Shoot all men first. Sleep with the enemy. Spy out the maori land. Kill all survivors. Betray male comrades as traitors. Sign peace treaties with money. (Matrimony as matri-money) Butcher bystanders and call it toleration. Nuke the cities of male technology and call it a return to nature. Outdo Stalin in pre-war Atrocity and call it Israel. Debase civilization and shame Hitler in your mounds of little corpses. Destroy all economies and call it 'girls just wanna have fun'. The end of the world: thats what little girls are made of.

Feminism is an end game. The last generation. Feminism is the end of (all) the world. Goodbye civilization.

Hello abomination, endless violence and appalling deaths.*

Feminist Apologetic Myth 'Fact' #5 - Boys abused by males are or will become homosexual.

While there are different theories about how the sexual orientation develops, experts in the human sexuality field do not believe that premature sexual experiences play a significant role in late adolescent or adult sexual orientation. It is unlikely that someone can make another person a homosexual or heterosexual. Sexual orientation is a complex issue and there is no single answer or theory that explains why someone identifies himself as homosexual, heterosexual or bi-sexual. Whether perpetrated by older males or females, boys' or girls' premature sexual experiences are damaging in many ways, including confusion about one's sexual identity and orientation.

Many boys who have been abused by males erroneously believe that something about them sexually attracts males, and that this may mean they are homosexual or effeminate. Again, not true. Pedophiles who are attracted to boys will admit that the lack of body hair and adult sexual features turns them on. The pedophile's inability to develop and maintain a healthy adult sexual relationship is the problem - not the physical features of a sexually immature boy. They just almost always happen to be – well, - boys.

Feminist Apologetic  Myth 'Fact' #6 - The "Vampire Syndrome", that is, boys who are sexually abused, like the victims of Count Dracula, go on to "bite" or sexually abuse others.

This myth is especially dangerous because it can create a terrible stigma for the child, that he is destined to become an offender. Boys might be treated as potential perpetrators rather than victims who need help. While it is true that most perpetrators have histories of sexual abuse, it is NOT true that most victims go on to become perpetrators. Research by Jane Gilgun, Judith Becker and John Hunter found a primary difference between perpetrators who were sexually abused and sexually abused males who never perpetrated: non-perpetrators told about the abuse, and were believed and supported by significant people in their lives. Again, the majority of victims do not go on to become adolescent or adult perpetrators; and those who do perpetrate in adolescence usually don't perpetrate as adults if they get help when they are young.

What this psuedo explanation does not say: That all perpetrators were once abused: thus locking a smear campaign against all men by implication in suggesting through this absent fuller account that men alone are capable-as if ''unabused" - they could as it were- out of their own inner evil maleness- do this. It is also further assumed by such explainations that no women do this or no lesbians. (We must somehow keep the 'lesbian image pure?' How sick is that?) The psuedo explanation also avoids naming the over-sexualising of society by queer- theory, liberation theory and Freudian 'repression theory' that is at the root cause of all this. Other ages had hardly any of this. Since ideals are at least aimed for if fallen short of. Hypocrisy is a higher value than 'perpetrator society' if the ideal is set too high to obtain. High values are necessary and useful. Hypocrite-phobia always succeeds in setting the lowest values as attainable and people willingly perpetrate them. I prefer hypocrites with high values who at least aim at them, - to perpetrators with none.

Feminist Apologetic Myth #7 - If the perpetrator is female, the boy or adolescent should consider himself fortunate to have been initiated into heterosexual activity.

In reality, premature or coerced sex, whether by a mother, aunt, older sister, baby-sitter or other female in a position of power over a boy, causes confusion at best, and rage, depression or other problems in more negative circumstances. To be used as a sexual object by a more powerful person, male or female, is always abusive and often damaging.

Believing these myths is dangerous and damaging.

· So long as society believes these myths, and teaches them to children from their earliest years, sexually abused males will be unlikely to get the recognition and help they need.

· So long as society believes these myths, sexually abused males will be more likely join the minority of survivors who perpetuate this suffering by abusing others.

· So long as boys or men who have been sexually abused believe these myths, they will feel ashamed and angry.

· And so long as sexually abused males believe these myths they reinforce the power of another devastating myth that all abused children struggle with: that it was their fault. It is never the fault of the child in a sexual situation - though perpetrators can be quite skilled at getting their victims to believe these myths and take on responsibility that is always and only their own. For any male who has been sexually abused, becoming free of these myths is an essential part of the recovery process.

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